Being in the Pits leads to what you can learn


If I am seeming to criticize  you, contradict you, tell me how, because maybe I just do not have a clue.

No Helena, not at all. I agree life is not just about striving for the constant next high(est spiritual feeling), although there are plenty of people who take that approach. It’s just a different song on the same old channel. But I do believe that in order to learn through experiencing “being in the pits” is essential, what is also essential, which most people do not realize, there is a moment when you have felt it, learned from it, and need to move on from it. You can’t see the light with your face in the mud. At some point you need to pick your face up out of the mud, turn your head around and look up. To me this is a sensory thing, where you feel that moment when you have fully experienced “whatever,” and its time to move ahead. And part of that experiencing of “being in the pits” is being alright with that, without any judgment. Having judgment on it is what keeps people stuck for longer than necessary, because they are resisting the experience.

That’s my experience of this in any case.

I did tell you immediately how well worded this is, and that it is greatly appreciated.  I think that it leaves it open for the question, do I keep going back to being in the pits, and if so, how come, to what purpose, and is it something I ought to question.  You have made such an important  point for me.
And, I can answer it.

When I realized that Art remained convinced that totaling my car had been my own fault, regardless of a speeding truck, it made me remember my mother not trusting me, when almost any mother would have had grave doubts about running out of gas and getting home late from a date.  Laughable, really, yet at the time I was really let down that my own Mother doubted me, when I was telling the truth.  Not the bottom of the pits by now, laughable.  Even I have to realize how it appeared.  At the time, it was a real let down about her being so sure that I must be lying about it.  I also was let down about Art, being so convinced the accident was my own fault.  But I was not left doubting myself, because even the investigating policeman was the one to assure me about how the accident happened.  But, out of such a minor thing, and it was minor, even if it was a let down about Art.  We have not missed having another car.  We broke even financially.  It really finalized my wish to no longer go to work routinely, when I could easily do the bookkeeping here at home.  It gave me much more free time.  And, as it turned out, having this happen was a trigger for new impressions to come to me.

I had told you that, unexpectedly, it was immediately after, still with this as a “low” point, that I started to get the impressions about the fallen angels, and a history of angelic events at that time, and the controversy and condemnation the fallen angels experienced.  My low point was not deep like “being in the pits”, but  I did feel, and did realize that I need not doubt myself, nor defend myself, just because Art was so certain it was my error, my own actions, that caused the accident.  But, what it did was that I began to access a sort of an ultimate condemnation, being in the pits, in the history of our evolution, and of our own angelic history.

And this is my answer to this.  The low points are really and truly more understandable, I do not end up doubting myself, as I had in earlier years, I do not end up with mud on my face.  In the earliest times I had low points, and they were awfully low.  But, I did doubt myself, lost my confidence, felt that any problem must have been all my own doing, and no one else contributed to it, because their accusations to me said it was all my fault, or maybe I was a victim..  But, I did go on to see what part I did have in causing it, and at least for that part of it I could do something to change how I did things.  But, in the ways that it was beyond my own doing, I could see that too, or begin to see it.

In those times, I described my inner guidance as being like a spring starting to flow, and it had been all choked up with mud, big chunks of it washed up and out.  But, in the first of the archetypal dreams and  the years of applying them, the spring flowed cleaner and purer, gradually, with a stronger stream.  It is an apt analogy.  It was with the dream I posted, the third dream, “The River of Life”, that it was as if I had finally come to where I, as a self, could be directive, and could stand responsible for myself in all aspects.  Before that, I was not owning up to parts or aspects of myself.  If it was not my own  soul confidence, or not my own mind confidence, or not my  own everyday life confidence, then it was as if it might  be me causing the problems, or it might just be that I was an innocent victim of circumstances, and it got done to me.  I made the change over to more self responsibility and self confidence then, with the 3 years it took me to apply the inner guidance of that dream.   And, that was from 1956 to 1959, approximately.

No more mud on my face, but, it did not end the low points.  They were not bad, only disappointments, or things in life that I could not change, but it was not being in the pits.  But, still, low points.  And, they were minor, I could easily dismiss it, see how unimportant it was.  BUT

There is a joke, of course, that it was a big BUTT.  Behind me, I cannot see it, but something is there.  Both of my later archetypal dreams were more about human nature, about depths of human nature, not things that happened to me, but if I had been in those shoes, could I have done any better, or any differently? The answer was no.  Circumstance, situations can be that bad for some of us, sometimes.  I had to realize that and understand it for us all.  It is a lesson about passing judgment, but it is a lot more than that too, about realizing there can be helplessness, we can be shattered.  We can lose all hope, all desire to live.  It can get that bad.  It could have happened to ourselves, in other situations, other circumstances.

(I wondered if you had experienced this in the event of the impressions about suicide, which you realized were not your own feelings.)  (Often, it was like that.)  I remember one such impression I had, I was standing at the top of the stairs and wanting to throw myself down them and end it all.  But, the big BUT again, it was as if it was a much older woman, and she was an Italian speaking grandmother, when I was still in my late thirties, and did not speak that language.  It might have been a past life, or someone else experiencing this right at that time.  It passed, for me.  I lost all impressions about her.

But what I mean to say is that, the low points could be ignored, yes, but for me, I found that to let them stay in mind led to important realizations, important impressions.  Even, gradually, to more eternal, more all encompassing human history impressions, which came to me as if I had always known it, and it  undoubtedly had really happened.  Some impressions about God in relating to me,  were true beyond any shadow of a doubt.  Not  that they could be put in words.

I did have one “deepest pit” dream, where I fell into the pit for all my dreams over 3 nights, and this was one that gave me an absolute knowing about  one aspect of how God relates to all of us.   No one will be condemned forever, no one will be lost.  We would not have been created only to then never develop our potential.  It remains intact for every created being, no matter what.  Only WE have condemned each other.   I have written that, but it goes on and on for pages, and I will try to locate it and give you a link to it, to then read it or not.  It was all symbolic, and the whole meaning could not be said in words.  It followed my last archetypal dream.

You know, this might be my next blog, as your question about soul was.  Thank you for the lead for writing this as a response, and thank you for telling me more about how you see things.  I would love for anyone else to comment, and share their own views and experiences too.  Why write if no one reads it?  But, I do that too, as a Journal, it was how I got started so many years ago.  In Life, Light, Love, Helena

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