All we do can also have effects in more far reaching ways.


Two thoughts, re your relatives “shoutin in the closet”, I definitely think God gets through to us in any way we can hold open or expect it.  My dear friend in “born again” beliefs was sorta “born again”, really, and her missionary work with some people, not all she might have approached, did something pretty remarkable in their lives.  A reason may be that it is different for each of us.  Yet, there seem to be basics, or common denominators, even at that.  Our  connecting as much as we do, as different as we and our experiences are, is an example of that.

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For me, it remained questionable if answers came from my own spirit, or from God.  But, eventually, it seemed as if my own spirit got the messages from God, and I did not really hear it, see it, or even understand it.  It was as if my own spirit got it a little at a time, and found whatever way to put it across into my ordinary thinking, so it made sense, so it fit it with something to connect it in.  At first, it seemed like other spirits clamored to be  heard too, and that was more like a lot of noise, and begging for me to believe it, and to believe it came from God, but I did not need to understand it or really connect it to my own sense of reality and truth.  The real guidance had to be useful, or it would not have meant anything.

But, I wrote about a dream a day or two ago, and it seems to me any actual guidance from God, or message, or what ever came in that really strange way that I did not know what it was, something got through to me, and it was up to me to just follow through on some kind of a blind sense of what it might be.  I tried to describe it concerning that dream.

As if, maybe that is actually how my spirit gets “impressed” or has impressions, that always have to be sort of translated, for  physically conscious use, or words have to be found, or some connection, application has to surface so I can recognize it, but, really, I do not know why.  I do not even know what.   But, it turns out to be a real something.  A real answer, or lead, or way to go, or something.  If it were not to become real into my life, what use would it be anyway?

Saying this, there is another thing about guidance and what can be done, that is not really objectively real, even if part of it is.  I was thinking I want to try to say this to Michael, because he tries so hard and does so much good, and is not sure it is ever enough, when in another way, it is enough.  But, this gets to sound so theoretical, and  yet I have experienced it.  Let me try here.

Our energy is from God, but it comes as physical, mental, and actually as spiritual energy too, working with it we called it Life Light and Love.  They are different, and yet one higher energy is the source for all of them.  We may function in one particular way at a time, but it is never exclusively and continually just one way.  One is not superior, or more God’s investment  in us than another, we need them all.  We would not be alive without all of them.  It is not just spirit and it is not just love.   Even the way we do sense and use these energies are all harmonics to what the one energy God invests in us really is.

Now here is my experience.  My everyday work, relating, can be any single activity or combination of these, physical, thoughtful, or relating.  But, when I also orient to it as being a same effort or prayer or wish for everyone, or for the world and its well being, it is as if I am in harmony with something bigger, more far reaching, higher, deeper, than what is right in my hands or words and thoughts, or even the actual relating of the moment.  Not to JUST go in my closet to sit and meditate, or to pray, or to soul search, but to be doing what I do in everyday ways, and be oriented for it to mean more, if that be possible, for my energies to work at higher harmonics, even in ways I do not know about.  And, I get feedback, not always, but often enough, to have the impression this does something real, even if it is not objective to me at the time, or in what I am actually doing.  It has even seemed to be like something someone else was moved to do, in a very ordinary way, as if we were both somehow doing the same thing.  Even at the same time, once in awhile.

But, this could all be totally doubted, and yet, it has that almost real evidence of something more far reaching than I can know it to be.  But, it is a different order of reality, as even our guidance is.  It is not to believe in  it, but it is more to recognize it to be sent or received.  I have felt a great warmness in my hands, once in awhile, as if it might be a particular thing going on, like healing, but I do not really know it, I could not claim it, I cannot aim it, it is more as it it goes where it can be received, and I do not know where it went really.  It also is not just me on that wavelength.

BUT, it is not a group oneness, it is a one heart and soul and mind, and spirit, reaching out as best they can, and some few others whom I do not know or relate to, or share anything with, are part of it.  And, reception can be unrealized, like even weather responses in the world.  Or, an awakening of spirits, who have no idea of where the wake up calling was coming from

But, do NOT take this as saying I am part of everything, in oneness of effort with everyone.  It is when we are living in the moment of our own lives, needs, relating, that we can ORIENT to something more far reaching.  Not all we do goes into that harmonic, some days for sure do not, but some days DO, some moments do.  That is what I am saying.

I believe there is an ocean of spirit efforts to claim this as their spiritual and love expertise, and it needs not have any roots in ordinary life.  People can join in and feel great to be part of the highest spiritual love of all existence.  But, I swear to you, it is in people who are living their ordinary lives, as well as to be oriented to any possible higher harmonic, that does in fact send out and receive in these ways.  Many are led to think this level of functioning is nothing.  But it is real, it has both real and objective results as well as more that is not in evidence.  But, it is not effective in the same way, if there is only the highest intent, it needs, it absolutely needs the common denominator of living our own life in the here and now moment and day, with a purpose and effort that, itself, that actual energy, is also active in a harmonic way. It need not be aimed, sent with intention, if goes to where it will be received.

 And, I have tried every way I can to say this, and it often seems to be controversial, as if I am going against either what someone else believes, or have experienced differently than I have and do.   I can write more about my own evidence of it happening, but not now.  I should add this to my blog, it is again getting closer to what I keep trying to put in words.

Here is the dream I mention

I was seeing myself do a series of things, but I had no idea what, as if it was a map of them, or a symbolic representation of what it was.  In two or three such series, there was in each one, a particular container that was being destroyed, as soon as it was made, by intent, or by time, or by life, or whatever, but it did not matter.  I had built it, or said it, or done it, and that was all that was needed.  If it was attacked, or merely temporal, so it could not last, it did not matter.  It had been built, and it was in a series of other things which would themselves reflect what it must have been.  They stood for what they were and would last anyway.

I do feel what I was able to write today came out of it, as what would last, even if it could not be what was contained and only temporal, not lasting.  This is the closest I have come to saying what I need to say.

More and more I know I am just being myself, I have had miracles in my life, and for some of these, and maybe all of them I did my part.  But, I cannot do any thing like that just on my own, by my choice or effort or intention.  Yet that is not exactly true, either, because I can depend on miracles happening, and my own part in it taking place, as the way my life has been lived, and can be lived without knowing what to expect.  I feel that it is spiritual functioning, as the saints also exemplified, but the way we saw them as saints was equally a way to make us feel it had to be beyond us, and beyond our own potentials, and beyond anything we could take on faith or expect.  It is as if it is with God’s blessing, but that always remains to be received, as if it is  always given in grace, or, outside of any way we ourselves deserve or earn or need.  To trust God in this rests on being able to trust ourselves and each other to the extent I am trying to describe in what I write here.

As I reread, it is as if I built a container, which was destroyed, but it held something, and that something was ethereal, or temporal, it could not exist at all really, it was something received, and only realized by the container into which it was given.  This is what I am trying to describe.  It is as if it is a response God makes to us, only when we are building all the rest of the bridge upon which it can be hoped for, or trusted for.  In a way we never see or hear what it was, and  yet we go on as if we did receive it.  We received something, that is for sure.

It is as if the balance I seek is unattainable, really, and yet it is as if, in a more general way, I have it all the time.  It is even like standing on two feet, on a ball that is forever in motion, and no standstill can ever stay in balance on it. And,  yet balance is something our spirit has as a kind of spiritual sense, if we will keep reaching deeply for it as our way of life.  It is in present time, here and now, and not anchored in the past or a beacon into the future.  It is also just being ourselves.  But, it also is as if that exact moment of time does not exist, either.  It is as if our two feet give us balance, as if one is standing in the past we trust, and the other is planted where there is a sense of direction we trust into our future.  The point of balance does not really exist, except that our own spirits have a sense of it, and we can rely on that , just out of trust.

That is the best I can do to describe what the dream seems to mean.  I think I should post this to share it.

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